Arranged M&A..Oops..I meant marriage!

Coming from a joint family with a really huge base of relatives all scattered around in the vicinity offers far too many advantages. As kids, we had our own gang which was so high in number that, the elders feared all of us coming together at one place in one time. A reckless gang, where the age difference was as large as 10 years. We have played hide and seek and every single board game be it a ludo or a business or a monopoly. And we played cricket in all the seasons and times of day and night, including the indoor cricket where hitting the tube light was considered as “out”.

Time flies and today most of them who were elder to me are married or on the verge of getting so. Coming to the point of marriage, they all have been very true to what was expected of them. Each and single soul went through the process of “arranged marriage”. All my hopes of having someone in my family who would do a love marriage were belied every single time. Never mind. Now, if they couldn’t find one for themselves, I am not really the right person to blame them. After all people living in glass house shouldn’t be throwing stones at others.

But what has always amused me is the entire long process of arranged marriage which is no less than a Corporate M&A. Well don’t raise your eyebrows. I am not exaggerating.

The above pictorial representation is taken from one of the many ordeals of slides we went through during the MBA days. It all starts with a strategic plan where the elder decides that its time the protagonist gets married. This could be due to reasons across all the aspects. Crossing the threshold age or completing a post graduate degree is the simplest of the reasons. It could also be if the eldest member wants to see a grandchild or great grandchild or even in situations when suddenly people realize they didn’t have a marriage for quite so many years ( 5 or more) and now it is time to have some party and reunion with all the kiths and kin.

Once it is approved and the would-be bride or groom is informed about the same, the elders try to show their flexibility and liberal nature by asking if the protagonist has someone in life. The questions are not supposed to be taken in a literal manner. Its only accepted answer, is “No, I am fine with whoever you think is suitable for me.”

I have seen families using the matrimonial sites, but I guess, in a tier 2 and 3 cities, even that isn’t required. The elders (possibly the most connected one) only need to put a word in the community and the message travels far and wide about the intentions of a possible merger..oops a marriage alliance. A number of proposals come along the quality and quantity depending upon the protagonist as well as the family. (Read company and group company/promoters). Every application is studied and a proper due diligence is performed by both the parties which involves interaction with protagonist and a general survey of the past track records known it the market and close friends. A set of possible targets are identified and the deal is sealed based on parameters like financial stability, cultural similarities, possible synergies and of course the not so official factors like the amount of peer pressure and miscellaneous “financial transactions.” Not to forget, the valuation done is a matter of subjectivity and is based on the information both public and private acquired through both reliable and unreliable sources. The model encompasses a detailed list of factors and its correlation with the final number which could contain 6 to 8 zeroes. But then as we all know, at the end of the day, it is just a call one needs to take and pray that its close enough to the reality.

Once all of this is in place, it’s time for the execution and here it is the ability of the two parties to manage their expenses and time frame as any deviation or extension in the timelines could make the entire deal fall through. All this while, the 2 nominal central characters are allowed to interact; not to decide but just to be prepared for what is going to come ahead.

Finally the deal... I mean the marriage takes place and its success is measured by parameters quite varying in nature. After the cultural and financial synergies are formed, one might expect to have some harmonious relationship between the two people. And yeah, at most places the parent companies have pretty short horizon and the profitability of deal might even be judged by how soon the small companies are born. 3 years without the entry of new member and you will get to hear every possible ridiculous/hilarious explanation for the same. Well, I think I should just stop now or else if this piece fall into the wrong hands, a deal in the distant future might not all together take place...

---Sriram

Journey back home

Talk about using multiple medium of transport in the same day and deciding within them in no time. With all the mixed feelings of leaving Mumbai, when I reached CST at 5 am sharp owing to my habit of being in time to catch my train, I was greeted by the coolies who with a straight face informed me about the delay. Rather delay seems to be an understatement. My train got delayed by 10 hours from the boarding point which basically implied by the time I complete my 27 hours journey to reach TATA, I would be running late by atleast 14 to 15 hours. For a second I felt if this is any indication to not leave the city and then snapped out of it as quickly as possible after reminding myself of the multiple signals I got to chase my other dream. For a few minutes, I really didn’t know what to do. So, I took the easiest way out. I called my dad for he has answers to almost all of my doubts. The problem in taking the delayed train was not of reaching late but being fully exposed to the upcoming verdict on Ayodhya and the risks of travelling after the sun sets in a stretch of almost 70 kms dominated ad ruled by the Naxalites. While the former was just a stretched form of precaution which I knew my concerned family would have wanted me to take, the latter was matter of common sense. No sane person would travel on that route once dusk settles. Even the police don’t. So why should I.

So now it was about which flight to take as I knew I am soon going to contribute big time in increasing the revenues of the loss making airline companies by not just paying for my tickets, but also for the excess luggage which was packed keeping in mind a train journey. Any which way, I rushed to the airport and for a change was pleased by the fact that I could still get the morning flight which was 2 grands cheaper than the one I was contemplating to book. However, the happiness simply vanished and I literally gasped for breath when I saw the total weight of my luggage. Well It was a little more than what one of my (ex)-roomies weighed, when he had his diet in control. I pleaded, negotiated, threatened and possibly used all the word and jargon I had in my kit to waive off some of the charges on excess baggage. But, I knew, I had no position to bargain and so the asshole sitting on the other side of the table took complete advantage of it and I ended up being a victim of corporate pricing of the luxury of carrying excess baggage to an extent which made me hate JET Airways. And, when I realized, I have paid more for my luggage than my ticket, it simply exaggerated my plight. Within few hours, I had ruthlessly reduced my hard earned money at a job which I just quit.

And amidst all this I yearned for some sleep which I hadn’t had for last 48 hours or more. But I guess, I had to remain deprived of that basic human need for quite some time. The problem is I can’t sleep in flight. So I just remained awake and even tough I was really hungry, I made sure I act miser enough to not pay even a dime more to the airline company which just took advantage of my situation.

I reached Kolkata, and was greeted by a hot and humid weather and people with moustache (which for many was denser than the ones present on the top of the skull. The prepaid taxi counter denied me a direct cab to my destination for apparently no good reason, once again leaving me to the mercy of the taxi cartel outside airport whose bread and butter comes from looting the newcomers through tampered meters and unreasonable fares. Anyways, for a change I wasn’t in that entire bad situation, as I did happen to have some idea of the city and so was able to cut a pretty decent deal. And for people who say Mumbai traffic sucks and Kolkata isn’t all that a metropolitan city, well it at least had a traffic worse than what we have in Mumbai or Delhi. The duration of my flight time and taxi time basically matched.

The bright side of the entire episode till now was, I got to meet my cousin after a very long time ad we had a good chit chat. Fortunately, I also could get a ticket to Dhanbad, which I didn’t really expect. After having a good time there, I once again left for the station hour and a half early which is generally a 5 minutes travel. But as expected today, transport hasn’t been the brightest side, I barely made it to the station 5 minutes before the departure, dripping with sweat and gasping for some air. I had a total recall of how I missed Rajdhani a few years back in a similar situation. Though History didn’t repeat itself and I could safely board the train.

And here I am now waiting to get down at Dhanbad and then drive back to my sweet home. The feeling of being back at home has already taken over me and I am only wondering what I am going to have for my dinner.  I am so much waiting for my late night long walks with Dad on our terrace. It had been a long while and it is once again going to be a long journey away from home after a fortnight. Till then, I hope, I have a great time with my family.

--- Sriram

The Ripples

As I gazed at the setting sun

The kids around fought, played, making everyone run

The soft ripples in the unusually still sea

Created nothing less than waves within me

Closing my eyes, I felt the soft breeze

As my feet sank in the wet sand

Just when I wanted to have the last look

The sun with all its deep colours just vanished

These ripples on the sea surface

Remind me of the unseen and the unheard

Those chaos and commotion deep down the sea

Just like the one within me, so unknown and untouched

Looking at those steady rocks, still unweathered

Gives me the courage to fight those waves underneath

To dream and to climb so high;

While still standing on those sinking sand

---Sriram

The Dark Light

I look up to the highs of the dusky sky

And down to the depths of the shimmering sea

Perplexed I am, standing at the crossroads

To choose between the heights and depths

One takes me to the glory unparalleled

The other in the world of unknown darkness with a ray of lighted hopes

And the seemingly simple choice proves to be the one

Most difficult and impossible with all the stakes

I feel so secured in the darkness not being able to see the truth

Accustomed to the grief, I find comfort with the melancholy

With no fears to fall down any deeper

Sometimes darkness seems to be the only light...

---Sriram

Sleepless Nights

There are nights when you don’t sleep because of work pressure and there are some when you don’t realize when the night passed away while you were busy watching a series of movies or making love. There are some sleepless nights when you miss people who were close to you and nights which see their end while you keep testing your capacity to drink and dance. And most commonly I believe the sleepless nights when two people in or about to fall in love (or lust) unknowingly contribute heavily to the top margins of the telecom giants. Apart from these common ones, I personally have had sleepless nights when I realized the break of dawn only with the chirping birds disrupting my concentration on social networking sites and quite a few when I, along with my friends, lost track of time discussing everything under sun or moon. Right from politics to economics; sex to society and relationships to pure gossips session the silence and darkness of the night has the potential to take it all. But off late, I have had sleepless nights when I did absolutely none of these.

When I was finally disturbed from my concentration into the vacuum by the trucks supposedly carrying goods with legal permits, I realized all I did was listen to the tracks of Sonu Nigam and write some 5 to 6 pages of some random stuff only to be deleted or backspaced. Playing hide and seek with the stubborn mosquitoes, who now seem to have developed some defence mechanism against all kinds of repellents or killers, I made quite a number of unsuccessful attempts to write something which could probably depict my state of mind.

Right now I am certainly not under any kind of work related pressure because technically I have by choice opted to be unemployed. Or to put it in better sounding words, I resigned from my job to do some business. I thought, it will be a good idea to move from being a person who sits in a huge office commenting on the top line and bottom line of a company; discussing the possible reasons for its performance in the last fiscal and giving a “call” on how the company and industry will fare in medium to long term to being someone who would actually run a company and make sure top line and bottom line grow in congruence with the overall industry performance.

For a change, I don’t feel like watching movies or increase the revenues of the telecom players or even the upcoming giant”Facebook”. Neither is anyone awake to talk about their dysfunctional relationships both virtual and real. And as I write this, it’s already 04 00 hours. Sitting here I now realize a weekend has its value derived not only from the past weekdays which suck the blood out of us but also from the forthcoming week which will once again push us to our limits. Now, when I know that in a couple of days, I will be having some real food sitting with my dad, this weekend just got lacklustre.

So coming back to sleepless nights, right now I have absolutely no reason to remain wide awake when I can have a long duration of sleep. But then who cares. Right now I am just waiting for the most beautiful moment one gets to witness after having a literally sleepless night. The slow and subtle transition from total darkness to the first rays of light which slowly encompasses the entire sky and puts the moon in the backstage is just worth it. Sitting beside the window on the 2nd floor may not be the best geographical location to enjoy the same, but nevertheless, the plain sight of the light slowly taking over the dark night, those sparrows hopping across the pavement in a straight line and an entire variety of birds shaking up the all the branches of the Gulmohar and subsequently the fallen flowers covering the entire pathway is something worth burning the midnight oil for. And even better is to see the sunrise on the Marine Drive, which happens to be a west coast. Well, try enjoying a sunrise through its reflection in the sea water across the horizon. It might as well prove to be more beautiful than the usual sunrise points. We once enjoyed the view and it was totally worth it.

And the last of all, there are some sleepless nights, where all I can think of and do is write something which I feel or think and possibly publish it on my blog like I just did...

---Sriram

Amidst the Mist...

Four souls walked on the road and all they could see was a dense white mist all around them. Walk 5 steps ahead and you are invisible to the people behind. The lights from the dipper of the vehicles acted both as a relief and horror with the moving dark shadows in the dim light. Be it my ex-roomie or my current, both did get scared at some moments; yet we continued to walk along, enjoying the exotic beauty just because we happened to be at the right place at the right time. Without any exaggerations of any kind, I must say it was one of the most beautiful and mystic sight we had all around us with the cool breeze sending a chill down our spine. It was a perfect moment. A perfect moment to have a Hukkah, a glass of whisky and a cup of tea. (not to forget the kanda bhajia).

As the smoke from the Hukka and mist amalgamated and created an all together different ambience for us in an otherwise a very usual place and the moonlight tried to pierce down the whiteness in the dark night, we laughed and shared talking the sensibilities and unusualness in an otherwise non sensible and common talks of life. Swinging between the past and future, we oscillated from dreams to memoires, punctuated with the small fights, claiming our turn for the hukka. . All four of us had a great time. I guess one of the most intense conversations we ever had together which we all would remember for a long time.

The next day we all went for the usual points where people gather, gaze and click to carry back the memoirs back to home. And while we were coming back, there was a peace of mind and a sense of happiness to have spent such amazing times together with my closest friends.

Without a doubt, it was one of my best weekends in Mumbai!!!

--- Sriram

With a sip of coffee...

I took the seat in the same corner table

And delighted I was to look at the colourful label

While the music was both retro and pop

I glanced across those seated in the coffee shop

As I flipped through the pages of “Atlas Shrugged”

A seemingly happy couple kissed and hugged

The oldies stared in horror and may be jealousy

As if what they saw was too sassy or classy

Right in the centre was a businessman

Drinking his 5^th cup of coffee in some anticipation

To my right were a bunch of rich spoilt teens

Who seemed to be absorbed in their own grandeur

Every single table had its own unique story in making

Which somewhere amidst all the music and commotion

Were knitted and interwoven into a common thread

Waiting for the moment to be set in motion

As I sipped my hot coffee now cold

I felt the thoughts mature and grow old

To realize the dreams and lives I want to mould

I guess, it’s time to take a step; both strong and bold

---Sriram